Wednesday, April 29, 2015

hatred and racism. who is at fault?

recently i was bored enough so i decided to spend some time with my colleagues in the office. most of the time,  i would just be in my room doing my work, but that day was exceptional. i think there was something i needed to submit, therefore the need for me to be there so i thought why not i chitchatted for a while. since i don't usually meet them, it was nice to sit and talk to them - just for a quick catch up of how others were doing.

we were talking about kids. since i don't have one yet, so i talked about my nieces instead. of their progress, their funny antics etc. i still remember i was telling them that one of my nieces loves to watch educational clips on youtube. there was a time, i caught her watching a clip, the lyrics were of course beyond my understanding, but i know instantly it was some sort oh Hindu 'nasyid' when i heard the god's name - Ramakrishna. we were actually laughing more of because it was sung in tamil and she made the head movement resembling the Indian dance, and seemed like she enjoyed herself too. but worry not, people, because after that i persuaded her to change to another clip and she forgot about it in seconds.

so that was the story of my niece. what shocked me was the response i got from my colleagues. i was hoping they could laugh on that because i think it is funny to think how innocent a child can be, not knowing the impact of singing such song, what more knowing who is Ramakrishna she was singing about. but i was wrong. because my story was taken in a different manner. 

this is how she responded to my story:

she started telling me about her son who loves lights. whenever they go somewhere full with colourful lights, the boy would excitedly show them with a happy face, and they would address that by telling him this and that. there was once, they were passing by a Hindu temple, and being a kid he was, he was excited to see the lights and started to call his parents. instead of responding like always, the mom just looked at him, and said nothing, the boy insisted showing the lights but again, no response. later, the boy cried because he was confused and i bet he was so scared why mommy was so quiet hahahaha. the mom told me, she actually didn't know what to do at that time; thinking that she could not address her son's excitement because she didn't want people to think her son is into 'Hindu' when he gets excited each time he sees a Hindu temple. at this point i started to feel uneasy. she continued she got an idea on how to teach her son to dislike temple - so each time they were passing by the temple, she would make faces - like you want to vomit, like it was disgusting. and now, her son is fixed according to her because when they pass by the temple, her son would make faces too.

i felt so sick hearing this, i feel like losing my mind for few seconds. my mind was full with questions. why are you teaching this to your kid? it is wrong. you don't puke seeing other people's religious places. like the non muslim should make faces when they see a mosque. why should they, by the way? it is a sacred place for the believers. why are you teaching this to your kid?

at the age of 2, he may not understand it yet. but hatred stays if you instil it since the very beginning. it is easy to love, but so hard to remove hate from your heart. why can't you just explain? i mean, of course he wouldn't get it first because he was actually addressing the lights, nothing else. in fact i was amazed when i know he didn't cry to see all the sculptures like some other kids i know. and why are you so scared? isn't it good that your kid could know all types of 'rumah sembahyang' because we are living in diversity? 

seriously, i don't get it. i already pictured me and my kid - my response would be totally different. i would say yes, the lights are beautiful, and that is a temple for Hindu. but we are muslim. we don't go to temple. we go to the mosque and start showing pictures of mosques on my hp. i will keep telling my kid the same thing, and if needed, i would drag the kid's father to putrajaya too so i can show my kid the mosques *tetiba je putrajaya padahal ada je masjid dekat rumah hahahah*

we are living in diversity. rather than saying they are all immigrants which i dont agree at all - read history. Hindu was here long before us. habis kau ingat bersanding, berinai penuh tangan tu daripada mana? but that's a different story. we as parents must not let our child to hate. if you are scared of their faith, work hard on it by practising Islam at home. in fact, as muslims we must not look down on other religion. the right to practise your religion, remember? what you can do is to be a daie, to show them the beauty of Islam through your manners. 

i'm sorry, but i am against those who think they are better than the others. my religion doesn't teach me that. what about you?

p/s: my colleagues are actually nice, but they are just normal people who have their own thinking that may not suit mine. but still, they are nice people. i don't write because i want to bash her, but to address the absurd thought she had, and how she reacted to the issue. this, i believe is common among us, unfortunately. 


  1. yes, people likes to use the easy way out when they should be explaining. when i was in college, i had a chinese roommate. we sometimes went jogging together. and we usually received the cold stare from some people. like what is this malay and chinese girl doing together? like race is a disease that we need to avoid when actually friendship had no race or color.

    1. i just don't get it - if they cannot get along with other races/religions, why they think we must not get along well with them too?

      i just wish parents can be more tactful when handling this matter, because as much as it is sensitive to us muslims/malay, so to them. sometimes it's parents who subconsciously turn their children into racist grown ups, though of course not their intention in the first place.

  2. not to mention when it comes to interracial couples. Mr.K is not Malay, dan gua selalu terima komen-komen negatif daripada yang Melayu kita ni (especially lelaki)..

    "Dah habis ke lelaki Melayu kat Malaysia ni?"
    "Rugi sorang anak Melayu lepas kat orang bukan Melayu."
    "K%$# tak sunat jugak yang hang nak."

    ..itu baru pasal bangsa. belum kira bab agama lagi depa basuh gua.

    1. hahahaha ayat last tu memang krik krikkk sangat. what makes a man is not the race, but the manners. kalau mentaliti macam tu, aku pun tak hingin nak buat laki hahahaha.

      and btw, bukan lelaki melayu ke yang dok mendambakan wanita berkulit putih mulus, mata biru kelabu ceklat kengkonon cantik sangat (hakikatnya semua gadis galak beli contact lense warna warni)? yang kulit kaler ceklat kusam ni idokla dipandangnyerrrrr padahal melayu majoriti kulit tak putih sangat hahahaha. cakap tak serupa bikin eh emo plak haha.

    2. Yep. I've received similar comments just because my husband is from a different race and religion.

      Some even went to the extreme and kutuk "pompuan gemuk dan itam mcm kau pun dapat mat saleh"


      Aku selalu retort "Bukan lah...tetek powerful, sebab tu boleh dapat mat saleh"


    3. hahahaha i cant imagine their face bila dengar kau jawab macam tu. sambil jawab, sambil tolak-tolak tetek naik atas sikit with a proud face hahahaha.

  3. So true. Orang Melayu ni selalu claim yg bangsa lain tu racist. Padahal diorg tak tau ke, yg Melayu tu sendiri pun racist?? Kita marah bila bangsa lain kutuk kita, tapi at the same time, we call them "keling" "cinapek" "nigger" etc in our everyday conversations. Tak tau ke these are derogatory terms??

    I don't agree with how your colleague taught her child. We SHOULD NEVER teach our children to hate other peoples faith/race. We need to teach them respect, not hate! This is why our country is going backwards....cause parents just keep on spreading their hatred onto their children. And their children will spread the same hatred onto their's a vicious cycle!!

    1. i think this kind of situation happened subconsciously la. happened all the time among my friends and family. we may not have the intention to hate or being racist, but sometimes we just do not know how to react or respond towards such thing. i strongly feel my friend was actually clueless of what damage has she done to her kid. and i don't think she realizes that way was wrong huhuhu. silap aku jugak sebab i didn't say anything huhu.

      and sometimes, we don't even realize that we are actually being racist. aku la contohnya. kadang aku suka buat gaya cina pelat just to entertain myself. bad bad bad. should have changed myself.