butterflies.

i've had my bittersweet parts when i was completing my thesis back then. and now, i'm about to embark my second journey of putting myself higher in terms of education. i'm doing something my dad wanted me to do long ago. i'm doing what my mom wants most, to make her proud. but i'm scared.

tomorrow, is my second meeting with my gonna be supervisor, i hope. but i'm terrified with the fact i'm not so quick like i was before, i'm not that bright; and i am terrified with the thought that people would push me away because i'm a slow learner.

i know negative thinking won't help in this situation, plus i shouldn't be typing in here ('coz i'm supposed to do some readings) but i'm just so scared of tomorrow and the future. but i'm not scared of the possibilities of making more money once i'm done heh so materialistic i am but who can run away from money, tell me.

i'm scared because i feel like i'm not well prepared even though i've read few stuff but still i feel clueless and helpless. in short, i am terrified because i don't know what to expect. i asked but she said just bring whatever. 

arghhhhhh takutttttnyeeeeeeee. may Allah be with me. it is just for one hour, but it feels like forever. may tomorrow is a good day for me. amiiin.